REPORTing live from 2025
let me feel nostalgic real quick
This is going to sound awfully dramatic, but I think this was the year where I really felt in love with myself and who I’m becoming. I came into January hesitant but excited, and I’m leaving December much more confident in who I am. I know that sounds soooo over-the-top, but it’s true!
Last year, I wrote an annual REPORT (based on that TikTok trend) to better reflect on 2024. I’m bringing it back in a very lengthy, unnecessarily nostalgic, and incredibly self-indulgent post.
reading:
I didn’t read many books this year, to be so honest — at least, I didn’t log more than nine, which was a transgression on my part.
There was one reread marked on my Storygraph account: The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. I first read that novel for English class in high school, and my reread was, ironically, for a college course; I remembered the plot more than well enough to reference it in our assigned paper, but I wanted to use the class as an excuse to revisit the narrative. It was as poignant as I remembered it.
Later that month, my friend and I went to Barnes and Nobles to browse. I left with a copy of Masquerade by Mike Fu. The novel’s synopsis made it sound like an eerie story about an unlikely coincidence, a vanished friend, and a book-within-a-book that blurs the lines between the outer world and the inner. Sounds fascinating, right?
Wrong. Masquerade currently sits at two stars on my Storygraph, but in hindsight that might be too generous. I cannot recall a single meaningful aspect of that book — all I remember is purple prose, a lot of drugs, and nothing paying off in any substantial way. The only mystery was how the same author who wrote this novel wrote its synopsis and found it to be an accurate description of their work. I was disappointed.
Masquerade sucked the soul out of me. It took me months before I was able to get into another story, and it took an incredibly cozy, comforting read to drag me out of my slump. I might be the last person on earth to read Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt, but I’m glad I did. The story wasn’t anything lifechanging, but it gave me the strength to push forward into my (second) favorite book of the year, which was a little out of my reading age. Don’t laugh — it’s Wings of Starlight by Allison Salt. The YA romance about Queen Clarion and Lord Milori from the Tinkerbell movies.
(In case you’re curious, my number one favorite was Sunrise on the Reaping. More on that later.)
“His expression went soft and unguarded when he noticed her staring back at him, as though he hadn’t expected to be caught but did not mind it overmuch. There was no mistaking the wide-open yearning in his eyes. He had looked at her like this once before: the very first time she’d crossed into Winter.”
Are you kidding me??? Bring back yearning in romance novels, PLEASE. I’ll take any recommendations with this type of vibe.
Wings of Starlight led into a series of other good books — including , Atmosphere by Taylor Jenkins Reid, Evenings and Weekends by Oisin McKenna and Minor Detail by Adania Shibli. The latter had been on my TBR for years, and I’m glad I was finally able to get my hands on it. I need to let it marinate and reread it next year because I certainly missed some of the parallels between the first and second part.
My most recent read (The Memory of Running by Ron McLarty) ended with a rare DNF. I hate when male authors excessively focus on the female body in their work; although I did like the flashback chapters of the main character’s childhood, there were one too many mentions of boobs in this novel for me. Also, Norma’s character was getting on my nerves. I couldn’t deal with it. This was a physical purchase, too; it will be promptly donated, but it always hurts my heart when I dislike a print book. Hopefully next year will start with more success.
eating:
‘Eating’ doesn’t really match the other categories I’m reflecting on, but I love some good meals! One of my earliest memorable from this year was at Waffle House. You may be thinking “good meal” and “Waffle House” are opposites, but you simply don’t understand.
In the moment, the Waffle House meal actually sucked. I was spending the night at my friends’ dorm with some other family friends, but for some reason I was really struggling with anxiety that day and Waffle House was SO overstimulating and I almost burst into tears at multiple occasions. But the chocolate chip waffles were, as always, healing, and we left with some still-standing inside jokes that I was able to appreciate more in hindsight, and — this is the main reason — while I was trying not to have a breakdown, my friends had concocted a plan to drive to the beach in the middle of the night and watch the sunrise.
Said plan did not help my anxiety, but it became one of the defining memories of the year. There was something truly magical about sitting on a freezing cold, snow-coated beach at 4 in the morning with the girls I grew up with, watching the sun rise over the still horizon. I felt more at peace than I had in months.
We got bagels on the way back — another favorite meal.
Another delicious spread was at this Turkish restaurant my roommates and I decided to try for Galentines. I had two delicious adana kebabs and my first-ever taste of mantı, these deliciously tender dumplings in a tangy yogurt sauce. I can’t believe I’ve lived with the same friends for three years, now. I’m not living with them next year because I’m commuting to campus, but I can’t think about that too much or I’ll get upset.
A few other favorites, rapid-fire: the Hokkaido milk tea from my cafe job. Masala-coated French fries for the worlds unhealthiest sehri. My friends homemade lamingtons and my gooey brown butter brownies. So much soft-serve ice cream from the shop next door to my summer internship. $8 tiramisu lattes from my favorite cafe, which I know is an absurd price but TRUST ME it’s worth every penny. The too-sweet strawberry cake my friend made me and our other friend for our joint-birthday party.
And I wouldn’t be able to talk about eating without mentioning the karahi my dad and I shared in DC, when he accidentally ordered a pretty-pink mocktail and looked at it in horror while I laughed at his confusion. Or the fancy omakase my friend and I tried one night in New York — New York was full of good eats (if you’ve never had a Hey Tea Crisp Grape Boom, go and find one immediately). I’m not a picky eater, but I do see a recurring trend that my favorite meals are ones shared.
playing:
First, my Spotify wrapped is a LIAR because Spring into Summer was my second most-streamed song instead of my first (it was bested by skinny dipping by Sabrina Carpenter, which was fair enough, but Lizzy McAlpine you were robbed). TikTok will never take that song or Pushing it Down and Praying from me.
My favorite musical memory of the past year was in April when my three friends and I drove six hours just to see Lucy Dacus perform in DC. An exhausting weekend, yes, but very much worth it because of the great company and the fact that Lucy Dacus is my favorite artist ever with the best release of 2025. “Forever is a Feeling” might be her best work yet, which means something because “Home Video” is also a no-skip album. You’re all lucky I didn’t have Substack when either of those released or I wouldn’t have shut up about them.
Aside from Lucy Dacus’s (boy)genius lyricism, my Spotify Wrapped said my music taste was dominated by Sabrina Carpenter. I’ve loved Carpenter since her Girl Meets World days (ask me about the time I messaged her sister on Google Hangouts), and I think it really says something about her talent that even amid the raging controversy, Man’s Best Friend has emerged from the flames of hatred as an undeniably excellent piece of pop artistry. Songs like House Tour and Nobody’s Son are arguably some of the best she’s ever released, and that’s coming from a girl who had The Middle of Starting Over going platinum in her childhood bedroom.
A less lovely release was Taylor Swift’s “The Life of a Showgirl,” which I was desperately anticipating as a diehard “1989” fan. We’ve all heard it, we’ve all talked about it, let’s move on (father figure is the only redeeming factor on that tracklist, and only the clean version because Miss Swift I do NOT want to hear about your dick size).
Other musical highlights of the year for me was Rhea Raj’s EP “Commotion,” Emerson Azarian’s debut album “hyperfixation,” and Addison Rae’s already-iconic “Addison.” But if we’re talking musical releases, the only one to rival Dacus is PinkPantheress. “Fancy That” and “Fancy Some More” were full of INCREDIBLEEEE songs that have been on loop for month. She deserves all the awards for her production. PinkPantheress if you’re reading this please know I am so utterly obsessed with you and you should add some more stops to your tour… please….. the South needs you queen…
obsessing:
I haven’t had any new obsessions this year. I’m serious. In terms of television and movies, this has been an utter filler year.
I fell hard back into my Hunger Games obsession with the release of Sunrise on the Reaping, which somehow surpassed all my expectations in both novel form and film casting. I could not be more excited for the movie release. If I am not there opening night, know that I ate some gumdrops I shouldn’t have.
I saw FNAF 2 and Wicked: For Good and Weapons in what might have been the extent of my movie-going, but none were anything to write home about. I also saw Materialists in theaters, but it was just so bland I don’t care to discuss it further. And no show has managed to reach the level of personal connection that 2521 reached last year. I need to finish Stranger Things, but I refuse to give Noah Schnapp so much as a penny of my worth so I’m biding my time for the edits and online uploads. I think I’d eat up Heated Rivalry but a little part of me is scared of that many sex scenes (who cares if I’m 21, I should still be covering my eyes at a kiss) so I’ll just keep enjoying the edits instead. I do think their interviews are hilarious, though.
Wait!! How could I forget about Superman? That movie was incredible. It restored my faith in superhero movies, gave me a new celebrity crush (David Corenswet give me ONE chance), and was the subject of my first Substack post.
If we’re talking obsessions for 2025, Substack was a big one. I fell in love with this platform in a new way when I started this blog. Although it’s been sitting silent for a minute, I’m really glad people are still tuning in. My post on South Asian racism went kind of viral and I don’t exactly know how to deal with that; the intensity of its traction was overwhelming. I’m someone who easily falls victim to algorithms and statistics, so I developed this sense of anxiety that nothing else I would ever write would be good enough. Don’t worry, I’m over it now; I’ll keep writing about my identity, interests, and observations into 2026 (and hopefully do so on a more regular schedule).
reminiscing:
We’ve already covered a few of my favorite moments from 2025, but really quick, let me indulge myself in one last bit of nostalgia.
January: The beach sunrise, yes, but also the unexpected snow days on campus that resulted in unlimited student access to a basketball game and a delightful series of cancelled classes — “I think that was the happiest I was all year,” I told my coworkers very seriously a few weeks ago.
February: My student organization’s event at the boba cafe I worked at. My barista speed maxxed out, but everyone looked like they were having so much fun that the hand cramps were worth it.
March: Ramadan and Eid, which did not fail to be one the most fulfilling part of the year.
April: The end of my then-role as an assistant editor for my student newspaper. I cannot lie to you guys, I was so incredibly burnt out. But I’m a managing editor now and I LOVE my job so much, I’m so glad I stepped back for the summer and pushed myself to try again because I couldn’t imagine this year without that role.
May: I started my first big-girl internships this month, which was exhausting but so incredibly rewarding. I’m so excited to keep writing and growing.
June: I had bought my sister tickets to a Beabadoobee concert. She’s a huge Bea fan and it would have been such a good concert for her. Key word, would — the show was cancelled literally five minutes before the openers were supposed to start. This actually wasn’t a happy memory but it had to be mentioned.
July: Me and my dad’s aforementioned trip to DC, which I wrote about for my first signed & sealed.
August: Me and my friends’ trip to NYC, the first time I traveled somewhere for an extended stay without my parents. I had such a wonderful time exploring the city and I’m itching to go back.
September: New semester, same me. Nothing crazy happened here, but I got to start some of my favorite classes I’ve had in college so far.
October: To celebrate my and my work friend’s shared-21st birthday, my coworkers pregamed and some of us we went to the bars together. I don’t drink, but I did smoke a cigarette for the first time (sorry mom). And I got to know my coworkers a little better and turn work friends into real friends.
November: My friend and I bused to the neighboring town for our college. I got some super cute clothes, had some yummy pastries, and got to explore a new location without going on some crazy trip.
December: Finals and the aforementioned creative rut really took it out of me, so lets just say I got some much-needed rest.
trying:
One fun fact about me is I never, ever make new years resolutions. The concept of them feels doomed to fail, like telling someone what you wished for when you blow out your birthday candles. But hell, it’s a new year and I might as well try. I can’t call them resolutions, though — so, I’m calling this my wishlist:
To start, I desperately want to get back into journaling. I used to keep diaries as a teenager — and even then I was wildly inconsistent with it — and fell out of the habit in college, but recently I’ve been thinking more heavily about how transient memory is. I don’t remember what I did two weeks ago, but I know that in three years, I would absolutely love to reread exactly what was going on in my mind. Looking back at old sketchbooks and diary entries fill me with a sense of nostalgia and a deep love for the person I used to be.
2026 is going to be a significant year. I’ll be entering my senior year of college and looking more seriously toward the future; I don’t want to lose sight of the present as I do.
The second resolution is carrying over from last year, when I pledged to read at least one book a month and drastically failed. I’ve realized in the past few weeks that I’m not actually so busy that I need to abandon every interest I have ever had — there’s always a way to make time, especially if I replace my pre-class hour of scrolling with a few pages of a good book.
Along with reading more, I do want to continue this Substack account. I loved posting here over the summer and curating this little community, but I fell out of practice over winter break. You might notice that my resolutions encompass the year instead of setting a quota; I want to build good habits, so instead of aiming for, say, 30 Substack posts, my minimum goal is to upload a signed & sealed entry at the end of every month.
The next two are vastly different. For one, I want some sort of romance in my life. Please, God above, I am 21 years old with no money and no prospects! Give me a little bit of money (through freelance contributions or an internship with a new publication) and some personal and professional prospects! I want to go on a date, even if it leads nowhere, just for the experience of feeling desired by someone other than myself. I just need to stop self-isolating myself and talk to people.
My last wish is to simply end the year in a more creative state than I’m entering it. I have been in the most all-consuming creative rut for the past few weeks, and my hope is that each of these little actions will prevent me from falling into that bedrotting, doomscrolling, glassy-eyed fugue state when this time of year repeats itself.
Creativity will always be my most cherished personality trait and the muscle I strive to train every day. I can only hope that 2026 brings all of us fresh ideas and better perspectives.
<3
I LOVEEE and trust we're all eating masala fries for sehri its universal
I love this so much.